Family Goals and Traditions

I've been wanting to post about a few new traditions we have started in our family. I have a few books that talk about the importance of traditions, helping families be connected to each other. I think it is so important, so I am always trying to come up with new things. Traditions around holidays are staples, but I am talking about traditions in the day to day. Week to week. I'm going to throw in some pics I took the other day, of our family just hanging out at home.

(I could have cropped this closer on the right, but I love how her little bum sticks out)
One we already do pretty well is our Monday Family Home Evenings. Our kids when they are VIP's at church, often say that their favorite thing to do with the family is family home evening. I find this fascinating b/c we do A LOT together as a family. We play games together many week nights, weekends are mostly just us. But I think the sitting together as a family, and inviting the spirit really helps them feel a closeness to each other, and for that I am grateful our church has encouraged it for 100 years. A recent general conference talk from Elder Bednar says that what is most important is that you have it regularly, not necessarily what it is about.
(Going over the new job chart)

Here is a quote I love:

Sometimes Sister Bednar and I wondered if our efforts to do these spiritually essential things were worthwhile. Now and then verses of scripture were read amid outbursts such as “He’s touching me!” “Make him stop looking at me!” “Mom, he’s breathing my air!” Sincere prayers occasionally were interrupted with giggling and poking. And with active, rambunctious boys, family home evening lessons did not always produce high levels of edification. At times Sister Bednar and I were exasperated because the righteous habits we worked so hard to foster did not seem to yield immediately the spiritual results we wanted and expected.

Today if you could ask our adult sons what they remember about family prayer, scripture study, and family home evening, I believe I know how they would answer. They likely would not identify a particular prayer or a specific instance of scripture study or an especially meaningful family home evening lesson as the defining moment in their spiritual development. What they would say they remember is that as a family we were consistent.

Consistancy is key!

We also attended a fireside tonight by the Stake Presidency specifically for parents of Primary aged children (3-12). It was centered around using the For the Strength of Youth pamphlet and teaching our children while they are young the standards so that when they are teenagers, it isn't new information. It is already instilled in them. They mentioned a few things that I have long wanted to do and have tried a little to do, but now have a deeper resolve to do. Centered around family traditions and consistancy.

They are:
-memorize a scripture a year as a family
-Have a family motto or theme that you repeat at least each family home evening
-pray morning and evening as a family (we have the evenig prayer down, morning is harder)
-read scriptures each evening (we already do this, and I am grateful Michael got this daily tradition rolling for our family)

We are going to do something with the motto around our last name, a sort of fun chant/dance, being silly and serious at the same time. Any suggestions???
The Dukes are:
D-
U-unified
K-
E-

That's all I've come up with so far.
(I have to add that Michael just got home from cycling...he even has gloves on, it was THAT cold).
I also have loved the idea of memorizing scriptures, because it has been so great for me as an adult to have had some scritpures memorized in my youth. NOW is the golden time/age for my kids. I wanted to do one a month, but Michael was overwhelmed with this, so one a year is good (but oh, to narrow it down) and it will become deeper seeded into them.

Now to share 2 things that my friend Emily shared with me, then blogged about (and Em, I could not find the post on it, link me up) that my kids have LOVED!

First in Nacho Sunday. We have a little tune we like to sing when we really like something, and nacho Sunday was lucky enough to be connected to that tune. We sing it on the way home from church now. I just have to rememer to have chips each Sunday. It's just our easy lunch after church. Chips with cheese for the kids, a little salso and sour cream for Michael and I. I love it. There, tradition made. We've done it for a few months now pretty consistantly. The kids get excited about nachos, I get excited to not have to think of making food for my starving kids running in the door from 3 hour church.
(click to enlarge)
Another cool tip from Em is Rose, Bud, and Thorn. She explains this well on her blog, but you'll have to watch for her comment with the link (it was a while ago). It is our nightly dinnertime discussion. I wasn't sure how the boys would accept it, being that it is centered around flowers. I joked with Michael that maybe we could call it Earth, Wind, and Fire, but the kids seem to like the gardening analagy. We even sometimes add seed, grass, dirt, etc.

Rose--Something good that happened today
Bud--something you are looking forward to tomorrow
Thorn--something sad that happened today
We also added
Seed--seed of kindness, what service did you do for someone today

It doesn't have to be complicated, and it often leads to further discussion. It doesn't have to be something that happened to them, but maybe that they observed (so and so got sent to the principle's office).

I was shocked that every day for weeks, they were so excited to sit down at the table to discuss (Alyssa even wanted to do it several times during the day, just the 2 of us). Mostly excited to share what they each had to say. We go in order depending on who prays (we rotate our prayers oldest to youngest from day to day). If you pray you share first and it goes through. Michael and I even share, and I think it is good for the kids to hear the good and the not so exciting things that we do during the day as well. We decided service was something we really want to emphasize in our family, and for them to think about it daily whether it be smiling at someone or helping at home, important to pinpoint and share.

More than anything, I want to create a family who loves each other and loves other people. A family that wants to be together. A family that has fun together, but also feels the spirit together as we work towards the common goal of being an eternal family. I want my children to know that when the world is a scary place, our family, our home is a safe haven. Sometimes I feel overwhelmed with the task. But I do believe creating and fostering fun and spiritual traditions in the home can build that foundation for them.

(LOVE that tongue!)

It even says so in the proclamation on the family:

“Happiness in family life is most likely to be achieved when
founded upon the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ.
Successful marriages and families are established and maintained
on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness,
respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational
activities” (“The Family: A Proclamation to the World”).

Share if you have something that works for you...